The Matrix Has You
by UrufuKiba22
Summary: Beast Boy introduces Raven to a small taste of the Matrix. Pure comedy induced by The Matrix trilogy and the Neurotically Yours toon 'Free Your Mind'


Hey, what's up? His is something that was inspired but both The Matrix Revolutions and Neurotically Yours 'Free Your Mind'. The majority of Foamys lines and Beast Boys are the same except for some tweaks and Raven talking. Moreover, everything after 'Damn you Neo!' is mine...except for the Teen Titans themselves. Enjoy!  
  
A dark green screen was all that was visible on a computer monitor, actually that was all that could be seen. Suddenly words began to form on it.  
  
_ ** Wake up Raven....  
  
The Matrix has you...  
  
Hey! I Said Wake Up!**  
_  
Raven awoke with a jolt as the odd dream subsided from her consciousness until she heard. "Don't you realize your part of the matrix?" She turned to find Beast Boy standing behind her on one of his Matrix rants. This however, was understandable. They had just gotten the Matrix Revolutions and with every new movie, Beast Boy continually applied it to reality.  
  
"All that's around us, it's not real!" Beast Boy said running around going into full lecture freak out mode. Raven sat with a skeptical and annoyed look on her face as Beast Boy continued with, "It's all run by a giant computer stuck in the back of your head! This computer sucks the body heat out of your body and it uses you like a battery! It's crazy!"  
  
By this point Raven had completely tuned out Beast Boy as he continued with his rant on the Matrix. Beast Boy flipped on a pair of sleek and dark sunglasses and said, "Do you know who I am? I am the one." Raven rolled her eyes and began typing on the laptop that resided on her lap. She quickly flipped through some sites until she came upon her favorite, '  
  
This however didn't stop Beast Boy as he continued with, "I'm here to free your mind, to get you out of the system and back into reality...reality." Beast Boy rushed behind her chair and peaked over it as he said reality. Raven having her attention forcibly taken away from the laptop looked at Beast Boy. "And how do you suppose I get free?" Raven said as she stared the green elf down with a glare of annoyance.  
  
"All you have to do is free your mind. Free your mind man! Free your mind!" Beast Boy said putting his fingers upon his temples. Raven was surfing through the World Wide Web once again in an attempt to locate a mental hospital for abovementioned Beast Boy when he said, "Like I did! Watch, I know kung fu!" Beast Boy proceeded in to several kung fu like actions and some very not kung fu actions.  
  
It started with a high kick that flowed into a chop than a jumping kick...then licking an ice cream cone, then changing the TV channel. Finally, he went for a truly impressive flying kick but for some reason he became stuck mid-air. "Alright, what is this?" Beast Boy said gesturing down at his floating self. Raven looked at his form with a quirked eyebrow confused at how he was doing this.  
  
"You know I couldn't show you with a bunch of really quick fight moves I had to go with the super trippy slow motion ultra awesome combat move. Now I'm gonna be here all week! Dang it the Matrix did it to me again!" Beast Boy yelled as he floated mid-air. Raven had a slight grin on her face as she turned back to her laptop. "Don't move! I'll get to you eventually..." Beast Boy yelled pointing at Raven. She was tempted to leave but she decided to wait around and see what would happen.  
  
After a few moments of silence, she began to hear groans and moans. She looked over at Beast Boy and he was stretching from his position trying to reach her. He transformed into several animals but all stayed in the same floating stationary position. Back in his human form he reached out for Raven and grunted out, "Almost there...uh...so close, so close....free your mind...free your mind...aw man." Beast Boy said giving up in favor of waiting for himself to come down naturally.  
  
Raven began to leave and Beast Boy asked, "Hey where're you goin?" Raven said, "To get some Herbal Tea. You want anything?" Beast Boy tapped his chin in thought and said, "Uh yeah could you get me a soda?"  
  
**FIVE HOURS LATER  
**  
Raven sat in the same chair she had five hours beforehand reading a book as she waited for Beast Boy to come down from his levitating state. Beast Boy, glasses pushed up on his head, sucked on his third soda and he finally was fed up with this floating state as he yelled, "Oh come on! What is this! Damn you Neo!" Raven looked up from her book that now replaced the laptop and saw Beast Boy squirming in mid-air.  
  
"What's wrong with you?" She asked as he continued to squirm. "I have to go to the bathroom!" He yelled. "I told you, you shouldn't have had that third soda." Raven said returning to her book. Beast Boy growled and he began to think of ways to get out of this. He transformed into a bird but as he flapped his wings, he stayed in the same spot he had for several hours now. Beast Boy transformed back and said, "Ok if that didn't work..."  
  
**TWO HOURS LATER  
**  
Beast Boy had tried just about everything to get himself down from his mid-air stay. He tried so many things he failed to notice that his feet were only inches from the ground. "Ok I did that...what's next?" Beast Boy said to himself getting desperate because nature was calling severely. Raven rolled her eyes as she looked at Beast Boy and said, "Beast Boy look down."  
  
Beast Boy quirked an eyebrow and looked down seeing his feet were only inches from the ground. "Sweet!" Beast Boy said as he stretched his foot to make contact with the ground. The second Beast Boys toe hit the ground all the force that held him in the air turned into the force that was supposed to be used for his kick. It thrust him forward so forcefully that when he fell he began to roll.  
  
He hit the wall with a thud and he fell back down seeing the world spin. He saw Raven walk to him kneeling down checking him for injuries. "You ok?" She asked with a touch of concern, which was odd for Raven. "Stop the room I want to get off..." Beast Boy said holding his head trying to stop the room from spinning.  
  
Raven helped him to his feet and assisted him to the couch where he finally gained his bearings. "Thanks." Beast boy said as the world ceased to rotate around him. "Don't mention it." Raven said as she returned to her chair. Beast Boy got up after a while and switched on the Gamestation. Putting in the Matrix game, he started playing it. "At least here I don't get stuck." He said as the game suddenly froze Neo in mid-air.  
  
"DAMN IT!" He shouted to the sky as he was killed. He ran up to the Gamestation and in the heat of the moment he picked it up threw it on the ground then proceeded to stomp on it several times in the form of a giant ape. Suddenly without warning, the ground began to give way and Beast Boy jumped out of the way as a large section of the floor came loose. It fell to the next floor, then the next, and so on.  
  
They looked down the hole and saw underneath the gigantic mass of plaster mixed with concrete a large blue metallic thing protruded slightly from the rubble. It, of course, was the T-Car. Noticing what he just for the first time Beast Boy and Raven stood frozen seeing what had just transpired in Titans Tower. "Movies?" Beast Boy asked Raven as he quickly turned to her. Raven looked at him and nodded knowing no matter what she didn't want to be at Titans Tower when Cyborg got there.  
  
With the previously mentioned mechanical man...  
  
Cyborg sat in the restaurant chatting with Robin and Star when he suddenly felt a twinge of pain in his heart. Keeling over for a few moments he quickly regained his upright position. Robin asked, "What happened Cyborg?" Cyborg looked at the two with anger in his eyes as he said, "I sense a disturbance in the force..."  
  
Well how was that? It was a spur of the moment thing and I just found it so damn funny that I had to do it. Hope you liked it. It doesn't matter to me if you review or not I just found this damn funny to write. Cyah! 


End file.
